News From The Guilds

Druids where were you?

Quite surprisingly, there were no druids present at the recent Convocation Of Guilds. Following the Haggis Hunt a lot of opinions have been aired concerning the status of the Druids in the Bears, however, while they mostly contain Bears it is my duty to represent them in the Guild Council. I raised the question of the druids in the Council as well as discussed the matter with Durith (head of the Incantors Guild). The situation is this, The Druids need to get a proposal about forming themselves into a guild to the Guild Council by the Second Moot or measures will be taken against them. It has been suggested that the Militia will be asked to shut them down, if they do not comply. So druids be warned.

Other News

Skyree, the Air Mage has been officially impeached by the Mages Council for conducting acts against the council. As far as I am aware she is still in possession of the Tome Of Air and is thus very dangerous.

The Armourers Guild has confirmed that it will not be supplying cold iron weapons, out of respect of the fey tainted, errr blooded, factions.

Gregor Mctaff, Bears Guild Ambassador.

I know tha Childris of the M.E.S.S guild (Sorry – Ed) said that the view of the head of the Mages guild had improved but trying to improve the name of the Musicains, Entertainiers, Scribes and Scolars Guide will be a tough one…. Anyone can enter but their maybe a small enterance charge to go towards the prize for the winning name!

Notice

I, Mephisto McSnaga, Foreign Minister of Caledonia, am taking an unplanned extended holiday in order to carry out some vital research.

In my absence, foreign affairs (of all kinds) should be directed to Chief Insulting McThug, who is already Acting High Ambassador in Betty McYokel's absence.

I should return for the Moots, but if I don't, then seek out the Tarantulas Ambassador to the Bears, Kalanar, for it is with him I am journeying. If neither of us can be found, don't worry - its probably just the end of the world.

I recently attended the Tarantulas Parliament, held on Conor Cu Chulain, Laird Buchannen's lands. Conor has loaned this land to Lord Lynsall (hereforth to be known as Laird Perfect) of the Tarantulas, they’re highest ranking male.

At the Parliament there were many scrolls discovered, believed to tell of the next Cataclysm and the destruction of all Elder races including Fey. I have no desire to see this come about and thus must take time away from my work in order to take what steps I can to prevent this.

May your ancestors go with you all.

Open Letters

Lord Justice Bratan

The Citadel

The Black Isle

Fifth Day of March, 1099

An Open Letter to Lord Agravaine ap Maelgwyn, Steward of Cudbright and Southern Caledonia of the Bears Faction.

Earlier this month I was pleased to come across a copy of that fine publication the McYokel Bull, the January issue to be specific. I was less pleased however to read the Memo from the above-mentioned Noble; I feel that a response, and some correction of misinformation, is required.

The Convocation of Druids was greatly pleased that so many of the Peoples of the Heartlands decided to accept the invitation of the High Druid to attend The Hogmanay Haggis Hunt on The Black Isle. We were unpleasantly surprised however that some among our guests seem to have forgotten the duties of a guest to their hosts. Indeed Druid Sarran McBlow, in whose halls most guest were accommodated, has, since that event, taken herself beyond the Mountain (something which few of us can do) and refuses to have anything to do with the People from the Heartlands ...until they've grown up! - her words not mine.

It is my belief that the main object of that good ladys ill humour was the raising of the banner of the Bears Faction over her halls. It would appear that though there is something of an understanding and friendship between the Bears and The Convocation of Druids, and particularly between the High Druid and The Morrigan, nobody deigned to state that this raising of the banner was by way of a affirmation of this friendship and not an attempt at sovereignty. I did, after the Illusion of the Banners had been cast and worn off, take it upon myself to discuss this matter with The Morrigan, to whom I was introduced by the High Druid Gathis. I had thought that this fine and holy person had fully understood our disfavour and misinterpretation of the events aforementioned; indeed she went so far as to restate the friendship of which I spoke above. I do not recall discussing this matter with any others - though this may be due to the fact that The Convocation of Druids was also dealing three other matters of high import at that time.

Allow me to state the matter clearly: The Black Isle is not, and never has been part of the Caledonian territory, though the people of the island, including the members of the Convocation of Druids, are grateful that the Queens of Caledonia have offered the island and its inhabitants their protection as we have no standing army ourselves. Further, The Black Isle I not ruled by the Convocation of Druids, but by a council of representatives of each of the regions of the island, thus the Convocation of Druids has no rights to offer sovereignty of this island to anyone.

As to your oblique suggestion that force might be considered in subduing The Black Isle: Firstly, can you not think of anything better to do than declar war against a non-aggressive neighbour. Secondly I find it amusing as there has been no successful forcible invasion of this island that anybody can remember, or find recorded in our texts; the coastal waters are all but impassable without guidance, and the population as a whole would not, I believe, take kindly to outside interference.

Your suggestion that Lasha might be persuaded to take control of The Black Isle Ritual Circle against the rebels (How can free people living in an independent state be referred to as rebels?). I would counter with the fact that as Custodian of all Ritual Circles he is, of course, welcome to make use of our hospitality whilst undertaking any activities at The Black Isle Ritual Circle.

To answer the question of who we serve, it is simply stated thus: The Convocation of Druids serves all People, within and without the Heartlands, who wish to raise themselves above dumb persistence and to attain their full potential. Here I have paraphrased the words of two of our earliest and mos beloved High Druids, the Ladies ANtarl and Dinarria - I believe that this answers another of your frankly insulting suggestions.

As to the political aims of The Convocation of Druids, we dont have any, other than to bring greater understanding of The True Balance and The Cycle of Life to all People regardless of Faction or affiliation. In this way the Convocation of Druids has been joined by individuals from all parts of The Heartlands and by those with many and diverse skills and talents, I believe that this might answer the slurs regarding deceit, betrayal and trust. It also makes irrelevant your discussion regarding who should control the Convocation of Druids. I'm sure that neither the Laird Incantor nor the War Chieftain would have any particular interest in controlling such Druids as certain Healers from The Dragons, Shaman from The Vipers, Mages from The Tarantulas or Hunters from The Harts? I believe that this also answers you confusion regarding members of the Convocation of Druids and The Gathering Treaty.

The Convocation of Druids is exactly that - a Convocation - we are not, as you made a point of describing us, a self serving patriarchal clique; how could you imagine that we were patriachal when High Druid Thol was the only male to have served in that position during the passed three thousand years..

The structure of the Convocation, though of no relevance, is well established and well documented for any who wish to enquire.

I would further discuss the comments regarding deceit, and the disregarding of authority: In the year of 1097, the Morigan pronounced that Caledonia was adopting Druidic Law for Civil Disputes. To this end she appointed Gathis, High Druid of the Convocation, as the Lord Druid of Caledonia, and bid him stand for justice in Caledonia. This is a Factional Post, and as such holds a Factional Rank. Within Caledonia the Lord Druid Gathis of The Bears is bound to make his decisions by Caledonian Law. However, outside Caledonian territory, the laws of the Faction in which a crime is committed apply and within the Convocation of Druids, Convocational laws apply. It may be noted here that where a member of the Convocation of Druids contravenes a Factional law that person will be prosecuted by the harshest law available this in most cases will be that of the Convocational Law under High Druid Gathis of the Convocation of Druids.

On the matter of the Ancestors, not only is your information wrong, but also most strange... The very basis of the Druidic Lore is that of Anu, and the respect for Her and Her embodiments has never before been questioned. Your suggestion that the Convocation is patriarchal is astounding and as stated above frankly insulting. It would have been blatantly obvious to any person at The Hogmanay Haggis Hunt with the common decency to enquire of the head of the household in which they were staying that this is not the case. I will not further discuss our beliefs here, but would be most willing to do so should anyone have the courtesy to ask.

The blessings of the All Mother of our Land upon all Caledonians,

Bratan

Lord Justice of the Convocation of Druids and Dragon Prime Druid

Dear sir,

First of all may I note that since you state that you do not represent the Black Isle I do not feel this is a matter that should be discussed with you any further.

On the subject of the druids, I am not a maker of policy and merely reported what I observed. Perhaps you should look carefully at the image your organisation portrays to others ... the Hogmany Haggis Hunt - hosted I would note by a member of the Bears Faction (ie. Lord Gathis) at the request of the Queens (and NOT by your organisation) - did A LOT of damage to the status of druids within the Bears.

The raising of banners side by side is indeed an affirmation of friendship, however it is one we extend to allied factions - and even they usually have the courtesy to inform us in advance that they intend to raise a flag ... taking a faction's standard by stealth is an act of war.

Finally I would note that I am currently unaware of our Laird Incantor's stance on the druids since he is currently being held hostage by members of YOUR organisation. If you really want to be accepted as friends then I suggest you have him returned at once ... otherwise you would be wise to avoid setting foot on Caledonian soil (e.g at the section Faction Moot and the Gathering of Nations - both of which are being held there).

Regardless of the above I thank you for the courtesy of your reply.

Lord Agravaine ap Maelgwyn

The land is not anyones but it's own. The Mother dwells within the earth and all things and even she does not claim it as her own. Patriarchal, Matriarchal? Does gender really mean that much to you all....then you have a lot to learn. Regardless of your arguments...the Black Isle is just a place we happen to dwell on and it is under threat.

If you wish, Lord Maelgwyn, I would be happy to recieve you on the Isle as my guest to discuss your concerns.

As I was unaware that Daffyd had been taken by the Vipers, I have been unable to take any action in this regard. As I am somewhat busy with my own concerns, Bratan, you will inform the Prime Druid of the Vipers to sort this out. If they are acting for their faction rather than the Convocation it is not the Druids concern, however if they claim anything in the name of the Druids they are to return the Laird Incantor immediatley.

I would also like to add that whilst the Convocation welcomes almost anyone, it does not welcome anyone that brings the name of the

Convocation into disrepute. I will not stand for anyone that colours our name.

Druid Sarran has always done as she wishes....this is all any of us can hope to do.

Eltha

Clansmen in Focus

Name: Teran McYokel

Personal Details: Brown longish hair, metal studded arm greeves and pretty fast when being chased! Oh and gets lost a lot!

Occupation: Scout (Huh – Ed)

Favourite colour: Green, for envy!

Favourite things: Inns, Maps & female company!

Least favourite things: Hard, armoured people…. Can no-way defend against them!

Would most like to share a desert island with: I could say but that would be letting my little secret out! The young lady will have to wait and see!

Would least like to share a desert island with: Any Harts, Dragons and anyone else I can think of at that time!

Least endearing quality: Too Nice!

Hobbies: Drawing maps – so other people can get lost too!

Preferred weapon: Dagger

Quote most likely to say: Where are we?

Quote least likely to say: I know exactly where we are!

Make your own Dragons Tail Soup

1 Drogons Tail (Not to tenderised – that takes the fun out of it! – Roger)

1oz of dripping (any spare tankard from thr dripping proker should do!)

A little bit of stick (to anyone rescuing dragons)

2 Tankards of Beer (better make it 4 so soup gets some)

2 onions finely chopped (so don’t give them to roger – "ya told me to to chop em finely so I did" Yes but not inta paste!)

Tomato Puree (or get roger to chop a few "but you said" Yes I know, god please help me)

Lemming Juice (actually reflecting on that don’t bother)

Cornflour (or Tornflowers do just as well)

How to Make

After ambushing a dragon, chopping his tail off and leaving a trail of blood for the rest of the Bears to finish his off. Wash and sking the tail then chop into pieces (Don’t even start Roger – "Okay"). "Lighty" fry meat in the dripping, add vegetables and half of the beer (ensuring you leave some for adding later). Simmer for a fight or two then strain (the meat I mean) Blend the Tornflowers ith the warm beer and add the tomato puree.

Mix this mixture now with the meat, re-heat then serve in a large bowl made from the left over skin from the tail.

Enjoy the feat and drink lots of beer.

T’Nair

Is the pressure of chieftain too much?

T’was the summer of 1095, the prospects of the Bears was failing. Organisation and discipline were lacking from their troops, their command was in conflict and moral was at a low. In these troubled times, many of their warriors decided to turn to the solace of the grain, rather than the faith, and strength of their queens.

Their prospects changed that year. From out of no-where there came a clan, unlike any had seen before. Their enthusiasm, diligence and commitment, were one thing, but they possessed the one thing the Bears faction was lacking: Heroes.

Led by Nobby McYokel, this small group of clansmen took the Gathering by storm. Where the people of Caledonia had no one to tell stories of, there were now stories to tell, and songs to sing. Yargon McYokel [Now Laird of the Highlands, ed.], led a one-man crusade to destroy all unliving taint upon the Queen’s land. Big Fish McYokel, vaulting shield walls and taking them down from the other side before the Bears’ main charge. James McYokel, who gave his life to summon the fabled scarecrow which routed the entire Lion’s faction from the battle field and last but by no means least Denzil McYokel.

The youngest McYokel present at the meeting [except Ash, Ed.] Denzil, was a loner. Seeking new thrills, meeting new people from new cultures...and then fighting them. At one point in the Gathering of 1095, Denzil sought out and fought twenty Lions single-handed; [there were twenty Lions in 1095? Ed.] not even stopping when all fifteen of his weapons had been shattered.

This all changed when their chieftain, Nobby, was taken down by a poisoned blade. With the absence of other McYokels, Denzil was made chieftain on the spot...and a code of conduct was decreed by his mother and uncle [Betty McYokel and Yargon McYokel, Ed.]

From this point on Denzil’s behaviour became erratic. For many meetings of the clan - such as the trade fair of 1098, or the second of the moots of that year – Denzil was not seen. Becoming highly reclusive, he would not fight, drink or even speak to the rest of his clan. When he was seen he was prone to un-diplomatic outbursts, and berserked uncontrollably at several people in his own faction.

At the trade fair of 1099, he was seen to be attacking people who he once called friends, whilst there was no danger around, attacked the high healer of the Bears [McCoy McCoy - his betrothed, Ed.] and was seen to be growling bestially.

The question we should now be asking is why is this influential and powerful clan following this man. As the greatness of the clan McYokel crumbles, so does the greatness of the Bears. Denzil’s actions have shown him incapable of leading them once again to greatness.

To Bears reguarding the future of the Dragons

1. During the 2^nd Moot of 1098 a stag party was held for Lord Prometheus of the Vipers. The stag party included myself, Baron Saturday and a number of Vipers and Kelanar of the Tarantulas. We were greeted with customary amounts of alcohol at every camp we visited until we reached the Dragons encampment. We were invited in by thegate guards and expected to be offered hospitality. Instead myself, Baron Saturday and Lord Prometheus were subjected to a torrent of abuse from Arcane. He refused to offer us alcohol and attempted to steal from us the alcohol that had been given to us by some of the Erin folk. He stated that he was doing this because the Dragons were at war with the Vipers.

I consider this to be a feeble and irrelevent explanation for commiting such an atrocity. This heinous crime against humanity, and against good non-human drinking folk, was also an insult to all true celts and therefore our Queens. A direct insult to all vipers and a direct insult to Kelanar, and therefore to his Matron Mother and the entire Tarantulas faction.

I suggest that an appropriate response to this would be an alliance between ourselves, the Vipers and the Tarantulas. (All Bears can help to make this happen by immediately proceeding to get drunk with any Vipers or Tarantulas that they come across). This should be followed by us giving the Dragons a good arse-kicking at the Gathering; I know that they outnumber us at least two to one (if they all turn up and they all fight on the same side that is!), but that will make our victory even sweeter.

More Next month!!!!!

Quick haggis!

For those who can’t seem to catch your own haggis, here’s some hunting tips!

Haggi always run in the same direction around the mountain, unless of course you’re hunting low land haggi, which are less desirable due to ropeier texture. Chase the haggi the other way around mountain, as their legs are longer on one side.

So to catch them position a friend a wee bit down the mountain. As the Haggi runs down, ya jump out in front of them. This has two effects, firstly the Haggi is shocked into turning around. Secondly as the Haggi has never seen the mountain around this way before it goes into deeper shock (as it’s lost) and rolls down the hill. This is when your well-positioned friend leaps out to catch the haggi.

VOI LA 1 Haggi

A Report from Cymria

The Dragon faction is holding a clandestine meeting in Erin soon. Troops and resources are being shipped from all over Cymria, so that there will be stocks of food other than potatoes at the meeting. Upon much questioning and interrogation, we have found out that this is not a council of war, but an engagement party.

According to sources, King Ash is to become betrothed to the Morrigan, ending the resent conflict between the Bears and Dragons. This marriage will form a permanent alliance of the two strongest powers of Edriya: Erin and Caledonia.

There are only two thorns in the side of this marriage, The high magician – Lord Arcane, who feels that Cymria, will loose out in ties between Caledonia and Erin. The current rumour is that he has leashed his Formorian allies onto both these countries, hoping to disrupt the wedding.

The Foreign Minister of Caledonia – Mephisto McSnagga, We do not know why he is so against the Dragons, but poetry to the Morrigan has been found in his lodgings in Dumyal.

An exclusive report by Propaganda McTaff

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